How many ways are there to say there are no traffic jams?

One of the minor joys of living out in the wilds of Gloucestershire is the relative lack of traffic. Relative, for example, to London where I lived for most of the first thirty years of my life and where a bit of my heart remains. Most mornings I listen to the seven-thirty news headlines on our local BBC radio station. Just before the bulletin, after a bit of banter with the presenter, a cheery lady reads out the local traffic news before handing over to someone in Bristol for information about ‘conditions further afield’.

There is hardly ever anything for either of these characters to talk about. So they have to waffle for a while about ‘traffic moving well through the roadworks’ and the like. On misty mornings such as today some sad driver has usually rung in to warn of ‘mist on the Cotswolds’ or ‘wet roads in the Forest of Dean’ perhaps but nearly always ‘everything is flowing freely with no major hold-ups in the town centres’. Joy.

You can apparently 'listen again' to the breakfast show from its web site although why anyone would want to is a mystery. It’s quite a good and pleasantly jolly programme which recently won an award, but it is essentially ephemeral. After the 'listen again' link, click on ‘Mark Cummings’. Enjoy.